Having children has been one of the most rewarding decision my wife and I have made in our 4 years of marriage. We have two beautiful daughters (2.5y and 6m) and could not be more thankful to the Lord for His faithfulness and provision in our lives and their lives.

Even over this short experience, I’ve learned so much about leadership.

Here’s the cream off the top:

  • Sacrifice First, Sacrifice Most

    • You aren’t the center of the world anymore. Ideally, you would recognize this when you get married or seriously start dating your partner. But it goes to another level when a tiny baby is resting in your arms.

    • You recognize so plainly that there is nothing you wouldn’t do for this little human.

    • Sacrifice First; be the first one to lay down and get uncomfortable. It’s not about you. It’s about giving your health, strength, and mental capacity to provide the best day for your child.

    • Sacrifice Most; there are no reserves. There is nothing worth leaving in the tank. Give it all and lay your head down with no regrets. Not only will you absolutely provide a better life for your family, but you’ll maximize the return on your time and energy.

    • In a similar way, in business and team dynamics, Sacrifice First and Sacrifice Most and people will follow you.

  • Boundaries bring true Freedom

    • My toddler gets nervous when she doesn’t understand the rules of a new environment or a new set of potential friends.

    • Taking 90 seconds to talk her through the dynamics and social boundaries of new situations doesn’t scare her.

    • It actually gives her the mental freedom to open up and start playing. Why? Because she knows a little bit of what to expect.

    • Likewise in leadership, setting clear boundaries can free your team up to operate independently and start the shift towards extreme ownership.

    • They studied this with children and it’s a great reminder to us as leaders to set clear boundaries to free our teams to operate freely and efficiently.

      • “The overwhelming conclusion was that with a given limitation, children felt safer to explore a playground.  Without a fence, the children were not able to see a given boundary or limit and thus were more reluctant to leave the caregiver.”

  • Sometimes, you understand things they can’t

    • I distinctly remember a story of my oldest daughter being about 6 months old.

    • She had a stuffy nose and was getting over a cold.

    • We have a Nose Frida (gamechanger) and it’s obviously uncomfortable for the kiddos when you’re sucking up their boogers (gross, I know — Sacrifice First, Sacrifice Most)

    • I had a realization that while I was clearing her nose from mucus that she had zero idea why I’m holding her down and sucking the snot out of her.

    • She screaming, crying, kicking, trying to roll away.

    • But no matter how hard I could’ve tried to explain to her… she was unable to fully understand the context of the situation.

    • She wouldn’t understand that when everything is all done, she’s would feel so so much better—breath easier—be able to take her pacifier without dropping it every 3 seconds because her nose is stopped up but she still needs to breathe.

    • I understood a higher level of the context of the situation that allowed me to recognize the value of he present suffering. Too deep?

    • In leadership, sometimes we have to make sacrificial decisions that, no matter how we try and explain it, won’t be understood by certain team members.

    • It’s not that they’re ignorant or dumb — but that they just don’t have the full context. And in many cases, don’t need to know the full context.

    • Yet, we see the greater good. The business will thrive better, be more profitable, reach more customers, serve better, etc.

    • So we make a decision based on the full context we know and do our best to communicate the change to our teams and create buy in. At the same time, understand that they A) aren’t the ones making the decision and B) don’t have all the context.

    • Plus, in every situation, it’s all a judgment call anyway.

I’m excited to see what else my girls can teach me about being a great leader. Thanks for reading.